Post by elizar on Oct 20, 2007 11:25:34 GMT -5
Something is really wrong with this, like if it is written by partial ADD. I am not even sure if to follow through or just let this die in peace.
Or am I just a bad writer or something? There is just something very wrong with this.
Ebony, Delfina owned by EbonyViper
The rest is owned by me.
Aron didn’t see the sun setting down due to the cave mouth facing north, but he did see the hint of the stars in east, and the slightest reddish tint to the west. The only one with him in the cave was his Rover. He did not dare to touch his left upper arm. The burn wound on it seemed to accept his shirt sleeve as a new skin graft, and Aron was not so sure about removing it, all alone and probably deserved it. He did have a second burn wound on his leg, where the bolt of lightning exited from him. He had been careful to cut away the jeans from that, since he needed to walk. While he had gone to this place few times before, some things were different, such as being in a completely different world. There were still some edible plants, but meager since he was in the desert. At least the stream was where he remembered it was.
It was getting slightly chillier, so Aron wrapped the polar fleece blanket around him, wondering if he should have gone through with what he did if he hadn’t been attacked by Delfina two days ago.
It had started more than two days ago. It started with when Daniel, Aron’s brother, got his kid with Liska, a healthy boy. After being a cousin for a while, Aron also wanted to have kids, but when bringing it to Delfina, she dodged it as she could. A few months later, Aron was becoming pretty frustrated at Delfina. They had been together for just over two years now.
Aron was through with talking to Delfina. He knew he couldn’t get her beat, and with her own talent, she could even make her own kind of contraceptive, so any attempt on Aron’s behalf would be shot down rather quickly. He wanted to have kids, she didn’t, and that made him look elsewhere.
Aron was working with the construction crew while Delfina was back at the mountain most times, helping with the preparation of turning it into a minor tourist spot, complete with hotel rooms. That meant that they were apart for the most part of the day, giving Aron certain freedom to look around.
Jessica had a five year old boy running around with few others. Her husband had gotten lost in the blowup, so she was pretty much alone some of the time, while being helped by the other mothers in the group to raise her five year old boy. She was at the construction site, providing hot meals at the required hours. Isaac had also bonded with the workers when they were taking a break. He was not permitted to be in the actual ‘hard hats mandatory’, but whenever one had a break, they went out to either meet up with their better half, or to simply relax without having a hard hat.
It didn’t take Aron long for him to take advantage of Delfina not being around there, busy at the mountain. After few days, he had bonded well with both Jessica and Isaac. He was proving to be a good figure for Isaac to look up to. Aron used his free time at first to play with Isaac, somewhat filling his own desire to have kids someday. With Daniel and Liska attending the farm, it was hard for Aron to find time in his work to come over to them and via versa.
Few days later, Aron was getting good with Jessica and at first she did mind the attention, knowing that Aron was with Delfina. But with Aron being good influence for Isaac, she stopped minding. Aron was not moving fast, knowing that Jessica was a bit vary of him, but he hoped that it would pass.
When it was still in the stages of being a work relationship, other seeds were being planted that a visitor picked up once she came over. The black and purple viper came by on occasion where the humans were, checking on her friends. Ebony was slightly interested in the homes that were being built for the humans, though the design did not allow much car traffic inside, but a court outside of the apartment buildings was being made for both the cars and humans. Aron was simply not careful during her visits, still in the thoughts that what he was doing was right. Ebony picked up the growing relationship between Jessica and Aron. It made her slightly uneasy, knowing that they had been together for a while with mutual respect, which Aron apparently had abandoned for another.
After her social visit and discovery, Ebony said her goodbyes and went to the mountain, wondering just how Delfina would react to the news.
“Hey Ebony.” Delfina said smiling when greeting her at the portal. Though after Ebony’s identity issue had been clear, identifying her as Kirsten Sanders, her street name was still being used among her friends.
“Hey Delfina.” Ebony tried to reflect Delfina’s mood, but it was simply overshadowed by her own thoughts and worry.
‘What’s wrong?’ Delfina thought-spoke to Ebony in case it was a personal issue that should not be overheard by others.
‘How are you and Aron having it now?’ Ebony said back.
‘We do not see much of each other at the moment, but when he comes back from work, things are pretty good. What’s wrong?’
“Let’s go to the falls.” Ebony said. She always felt more relaxed there than anywhere else. “And make this private.”
“Now, will you tell me what is bothering you?” Delfina was sitting down near the waterfall, not close enough to get wet, but still close enough to appreciate it fully.
“It’s Aron.” Ebony said. “I was at the construction site today, and he didn’t even try to hide it.”
“What is it?” Delfina leaned forward.
“He is getting bit close to Jessica and her son, Isaac. You know how she has been bit alone without a mate after the blowout?” Ebony looked at Delfina, unsure of how she could react.
“Aron…” Delfina muttered. “Do you know how long this has been, how far they have gotten?” Delfina’s breathing quickened in anger, frustration and regret. She and Aron had been close for so long, and because he apparently didn’t respect her desire not to risk child bearing, he was going for someone who would.
“I don’t know, but it looks serious enough.” Ebony said. “What should we do?”
“I am going to confront him about this tomorrow at the site.” Delfina said. Ebony could read her anger pretty clearly, and hoped it would subside before the confrontation.
Or am I just a bad writer or something? There is just something very wrong with this.
Ebony, Delfina owned by EbonyViper
The rest is owned by me.
Aron didn’t see the sun setting down due to the cave mouth facing north, but he did see the hint of the stars in east, and the slightest reddish tint to the west. The only one with him in the cave was his Rover. He did not dare to touch his left upper arm. The burn wound on it seemed to accept his shirt sleeve as a new skin graft, and Aron was not so sure about removing it, all alone and probably deserved it. He did have a second burn wound on his leg, where the bolt of lightning exited from him. He had been careful to cut away the jeans from that, since he needed to walk. While he had gone to this place few times before, some things were different, such as being in a completely different world. There were still some edible plants, but meager since he was in the desert. At least the stream was where he remembered it was.
It was getting slightly chillier, so Aron wrapped the polar fleece blanket around him, wondering if he should have gone through with what he did if he hadn’t been attacked by Delfina two days ago.
It had started more than two days ago. It started with when Daniel, Aron’s brother, got his kid with Liska, a healthy boy. After being a cousin for a while, Aron also wanted to have kids, but when bringing it to Delfina, she dodged it as she could. A few months later, Aron was becoming pretty frustrated at Delfina. They had been together for just over two years now.
Aron was through with talking to Delfina. He knew he couldn’t get her beat, and with her own talent, she could even make her own kind of contraceptive, so any attempt on Aron’s behalf would be shot down rather quickly. He wanted to have kids, she didn’t, and that made him look elsewhere.
Aron was working with the construction crew while Delfina was back at the mountain most times, helping with the preparation of turning it into a minor tourist spot, complete with hotel rooms. That meant that they were apart for the most part of the day, giving Aron certain freedom to look around.
Jessica had a five year old boy running around with few others. Her husband had gotten lost in the blowup, so she was pretty much alone some of the time, while being helped by the other mothers in the group to raise her five year old boy. She was at the construction site, providing hot meals at the required hours. Isaac had also bonded with the workers when they were taking a break. He was not permitted to be in the actual ‘hard hats mandatory’, but whenever one had a break, they went out to either meet up with their better half, or to simply relax without having a hard hat.
It didn’t take Aron long for him to take advantage of Delfina not being around there, busy at the mountain. After few days, he had bonded well with both Jessica and Isaac. He was proving to be a good figure for Isaac to look up to. Aron used his free time at first to play with Isaac, somewhat filling his own desire to have kids someday. With Daniel and Liska attending the farm, it was hard for Aron to find time in his work to come over to them and via versa.
Few days later, Aron was getting good with Jessica and at first she did mind the attention, knowing that Aron was with Delfina. But with Aron being good influence for Isaac, she stopped minding. Aron was not moving fast, knowing that Jessica was a bit vary of him, but he hoped that it would pass.
When it was still in the stages of being a work relationship, other seeds were being planted that a visitor picked up once she came over. The black and purple viper came by on occasion where the humans were, checking on her friends. Ebony was slightly interested in the homes that were being built for the humans, though the design did not allow much car traffic inside, but a court outside of the apartment buildings was being made for both the cars and humans. Aron was simply not careful during her visits, still in the thoughts that what he was doing was right. Ebony picked up the growing relationship between Jessica and Aron. It made her slightly uneasy, knowing that they had been together for a while with mutual respect, which Aron apparently had abandoned for another.
After her social visit and discovery, Ebony said her goodbyes and went to the mountain, wondering just how Delfina would react to the news.
“Hey Ebony.” Delfina said smiling when greeting her at the portal. Though after Ebony’s identity issue had been clear, identifying her as Kirsten Sanders, her street name was still being used among her friends.
“Hey Delfina.” Ebony tried to reflect Delfina’s mood, but it was simply overshadowed by her own thoughts and worry.
‘What’s wrong?’ Delfina thought-spoke to Ebony in case it was a personal issue that should not be overheard by others.
‘How are you and Aron having it now?’ Ebony said back.
‘We do not see much of each other at the moment, but when he comes back from work, things are pretty good. What’s wrong?’
“Let’s go to the falls.” Ebony said. She always felt more relaxed there than anywhere else. “And make this private.”
“Now, will you tell me what is bothering you?” Delfina was sitting down near the waterfall, not close enough to get wet, but still close enough to appreciate it fully.
“It’s Aron.” Ebony said. “I was at the construction site today, and he didn’t even try to hide it.”
“What is it?” Delfina leaned forward.
“He is getting bit close to Jessica and her son, Isaac. You know how she has been bit alone without a mate after the blowout?” Ebony looked at Delfina, unsure of how she could react.
“Aron…” Delfina muttered. “Do you know how long this has been, how far they have gotten?” Delfina’s breathing quickened in anger, frustration and regret. She and Aron had been close for so long, and because he apparently didn’t respect her desire not to risk child bearing, he was going for someone who would.
“I don’t know, but it looks serious enough.” Ebony said. “What should we do?”
“I am going to confront him about this tomorrow at the site.” Delfina said. Ebony could read her anger pretty clearly, and hoped it would subside before the confrontation.